Immlass refused to help me write this parody...

[mcroft]

Who’s the bus driving dick
That’s a sex machine to the old chicks?
‘SHAFT!
Ya damn right!

Who’s the cat that will rip a book in half
Just to see those fanboys gasp?
‘SHAFT!
Right On!

They say that Crank Shaft is a bad grandmother-
SHUT YOUR MOUTH!
I’m talkin’ ’bout ‘Shaft.
THEN WE CAN DIG IT!

He’s a really dull old man
And no one understands him but ol’ Lena.
CRANK SHAFT!

Inspired by (and first posted on) The Comics Curmudgeon